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| image source http://vermontcompost.com/compostopedia/gardening-tips-seed-sowing/ |
I remember the evening I was in the hospital winding up for the day when She came...
I found her lying on the hospital bed. A young adolescent all by herself... crying and afraid. She told of how she had had some trouble at the home where she lived and had gone to report to the police. The policeman offered to help and said she could spend the night in the cell. That night he raped her. Not knowing where to turn, she kept this to herself until she overheard rumours that the policeman was HIV positive! One week after the dreadful nightmare, She finally found courage to seek help.
I shuddered. I shuddered not only because of her pain and humiliation but also because the doctor in me did not know how to help her. You see.. in order to build a good case against a rapist, one needs 'medical evidence' which is often bruising from the vaginal mucosa that is mostly visible within 24 or maybe 48 hours of the incident (and that is really stretching it). Unfortunately because of the rich blood supply in the groin area, healing happens pretty fast unless one develops very severe injuries which is not always the case. It gets worse... The medication given to protect people who have been exposed to HIV from acquiring the infection (a.k.a post exposure prophylaxis) is most effective within the first 24-48 hours of exposure and the efficacy decreases over time. However, the free medication can be offered up to 72 hours after. She came in after a week :-(
In conversations with my friends, I realised She was not alone and it was not always a stranger.
Volunteering in the slums, I heard her voice again...
Many of these girls were often exposed to guys.. men.. uncles.. mother's boyfriends who took advantage of them. They too, did not know where to turn.
Do you know what is universal among all these girls who have been violated? It's not that they all had long or short hair, were a particular skin shade, wore particular clothes of a certain length or tightness... It wasn't that they all wore make-up or even spoke the same language or lived in the same community. It was rather that they all felt shame and guilt following the experience. The kind that is unfounded but hard to erase.
By now most people who have taken time to read it know that the Ant-pornography bill which was recently passed in Uganda (that has been famously called the mini-skirt bill), actually has nothing to do with mini-skirts. However, unfortunately it has been portrayed thus largely by the media and leadership figures such as the minister of ethics. Perceptions like these result in incrimination of women for perverted and often unremorseful actions by men which should be unacceptable. In a weird way, the nature of the publicity for this bill has 'legitimized' bad manners by men in the country who will obviously not take time to read the actual letter of the laws. It has sowed a very bad seed affecting how men view women; an aspect well illustrated in a blog post by Melanie Kitongo.
Instead we need to be protecting our women. Empowering them to see that NO, IT IS NOT THEIR FAULT!!!! Men need to be admonished to behave responsibly. Perverts and NOT the vulnerable need to feel uncomfortable in our society. We need to be teaching girls how to protect themselves and what to do if they are attacked. We need to also be advocating that our police forces be safer for the public.
A very bad seed has been sown! I hope that following the review of his bill, the media, minister and law enforcing agents in the country will act to protect not expose the vulnerable in our society.
For God and my country.
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| image source: http://www.thisisafrica.me/opinion/detail/20026/how-decent-is-decent-one-minister-s-sentiments-may-represent-a-larger-problem-in-uganda |
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| "Oh sorry, did my dress make you feel like RAPIST today?? "image source: http://www.scmp.com/news/hong-kong/article/1090759/march-challenges-bias-about-rape-victims |
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| image source: http://www.pinterest.com/pin/229894755949121092/ |
